Let's be honest: life can be pretty tough when you're disabled or chronically ill. It can be painful, exhausting, and hard to cope with a changing body and changing capacity, especially if you've acquired your condition in adulthood.
Pain, fatigue, and inaccessibility can make your world feel small. Thankfully, there are some tricks that can make your life easier and help you live more independently.
Accept help (if you can)
I know not everyone has someone who can help—and even if you do, I know it might feel hard to ask. But it makes a huge difference, and the people around us often want to help. Maybe a friend or family member can help clean the house, run errands, pick up, click and collect orders, or make some meals. Or, if you have funding for support workers, use them. Save your energy for existing because that's already a lot. So many of us wouldn't survive without the support of our communities, so it's time to destigmatise needing (and accepting) help. Support can be a massive part of independence—and there is zero shame in needing it, especially when the world wasn't built for us.
Use mobility aids
Mobility aids are freedom machines. While they don't work for everybody, they can be a game-changer for many conditions.
For a long time, I felt like I wasn't disabled enough to use a mobility aid. But here's the thing - if it helps, use it, whether it's a walking stick, walker, wheelchair, or any other mobility aid. You are allowed to use them whether it's due to pain, fatigue, sickness, or something else. My mobility aids, especially my electric wheelchair, have changed my life. I highly recommend them.
It's not ideal how expensive they can be and how many people who need them can't get them. However, many states in Australia offer funding programs outside the NDIS, like SWEP: Victoria's state-wide equipment program. It's how I was able to get my chair funded! So, it's worth checking out if your state has something similar.
Use assistive tech around the house
Finding the right assistive technology can be challenging—but it can introduce you to a new world! Some of the most helpful changes I've made in my home come from thinking about the most difficult tasks and how they can be more manageable.
For me, it's been things like getting a shower chair (which means I can sit while doing makeup and other self-care outside of the shower). Getting a hose for my bath (and a holder for it) so I can wash my hair even if I can't be upright has also been super helpful, as has my kitchen cooking chair, my auto-jar opener, and things that have made life easier, like an air fryer or robotic vacuum.
Many of these things can be expensive, especially with the disability tax we're often slumped with. But you can find second-hand items or places that stock similar, cheaper items. For example, my shower chair was from Kmart and has lasted me several years!
Plan according to your needs, not other's expectations
Learn to say no. You don't have to meet other people's standards or expectations. Make things accessible for you - whether that means ensuring your needs are met, taking more breaks, leaving early, or not going to things.
I know that can be hard. I often miss out on things and feel bad as a result, but rest is so important. And being choosy about where you spend your energy means you have more capacity to do the things you want (or need) to do rather than feeling obligated to meet someone else's expectations.
When my health worsened, I didn't do this. I'd be forced into many events that didn't consider my access needs, and it would destroy me, but the non-disabled people around me didn't get it because they were fine. Don't take advice from people who don't understand; don't let ableism and stigma stop you from doing what's best for you.
Connect with community
Follow other disabled people online, attend events, and join groups because the community can make a difference. It can help you feel more confident in your identity, give you tips for living better and navigating a world that wasn't built for you, and provide support when the world feels too much.
We're all different, and so are our needs. But even small changes can open up your world. They've helped me, and I hope they help you, too.
Zoe Simmons is an award-winning disabled journalist, copywriter, speaker, author and advocate. She writes to make the world a better place. You can find out more about Zoe on her website, or follow her on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn or TikTok.
Zoe has chosen to use identity-first language.
